Forget Daenerys Targaryen or Katniss Everdeen. I see these female heroines, inspired by them, but let down when the end credits roll, my reality is far from Hollywood.
In Indonesia or perhaps other patriarchy countries, it is a classic story of peer pressures for a woman to be a wife and a mother. Still? Yes, and it's 2016. Many families rather have daughters who cook, clean, sew and give blowjobs to their husbands because they feel that they have to. These pressures often lead to unprepared marriage, which lead to unwanted pregnancy or domestic violence. Rapes and violence towards women and children in Indonesia increase and are more violent every damn year, one of the many consequences of society who think less of women. The punishment of acts of rapes by law are 10 years max in prison, which I thought can be extended to death penalty, don't you agree? This country has executed drug smugglers from Australia last year, but still is very ignorant (or perhaps coward) to act big against rapists and pedophiles in its own country.
Let's have a little anonymous poll, how many of you single working Indonesian women who happen to be lost and reading this, who are 21 and up, have been asked by family personal questions like, "When are you going to get married?" or "Don't you want a husband and a baby?" or anything related to that?
Have you ever been asked marital personal question from family?
On long holidays, such as Ramadhan or Christmas and New Year, it is common for women to be asked such questions from family members when big family gathers. Most people see the question as harmless, but I see it as an insult. So what, now that I'm legal, I have to find a husband, have a baby, credit a small house, buy a car and find a cemetery plot? Can't a person experience life, educate him/herself and see the world? Or maybe, not married and not have a biological child?
In western culture, women are mocked because they're virgins, however in Indonesia, women are branded as sluts because they're not virgins. I wonder, why would our states of virginity, our desires to be married or our demanding and high paying jobs concern you at all?
A couple of years ago there's a plan by officials that any Indonesian woman who wish to be a policewoman or government's employee have to have a virginity test. I have something to say for whomever think of the liducrous plan, GOD MUST HAVE NOT LOVED YOU ENOUGH TO GIVE YOU SUCH LITTLE BRAIN.
Have I ever been asked stupid questions as mentioned above? No, maybe because I am not really friendly with my big family, and for those who know me, they know i'm not a very polite person. What happens if you are asked so? I will look at their screaming, pooping children, their cheap watches and gaze at their sadness and boredom through their eyes and laugh, the mean kind. You do not have to marry because people are married, you do not have to jump off a cliff when people do, you do not have to stay violated because you're afraid people will talk things about you. We, as human, have a choice.
In Jakarta, it is common for women to be molested in public transportation, especially on rush hours. I suggest that women who use public transport regularly bring something to defend themselves. When something happens and you report to the police, it is also common for them to blame you for how you look and what you wear. Don't hit them. Let their minimum wages and zero career prospect do it for themselves. I know, I live here almost all my life. And I know you are not alone. When you don't have the justice you deserve, be like Americans, sue.
I believe every woman has the right to be whatever they want, whether to drill in the middle of the Earth or pilot a spaceship on International air space, we can do it, better, with heels, unless there are uniforms.
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